Healthy Sex Life by dr george pollard1425266

Sex, said Jim Morrison, singer for “The Doors,” is dishonest. “The body tries to tell the truth. It's usually too battered, with rules, to hear and bound, with pretences,” to move. “We  demoralize  ourselves with lies.”

Dr Debby Herbenick wants to correct  what Morrison believed wrong. She’s co-director of the Center for Sexual Health Promotion, at Indiana University, Bloomington. Her research includes studies of penis size and corgasms, orgasms that occur during exercise, as well as the National Survey of Sexual Health and Behaviour.  

“Sexual pleasure is a magic spell,” said Simone de Beauvoir. “It demands complete abandon. If words or movements oppose the magic of caresses, the spell breaks.”

Dr Debby agrees. In her books, “Definitely Because it Feels Good” and “Sex Made Easy Too,” she writes of mindfulness, fully focused concentration during sex. “It heightens sexual arousal for women,” she says. 

“Men know they are sexual exiles,” says Camilla Paglia. “They wander the earth seeking satisfaction, craving and despising, never content.” Dr Debby  does not agree . In the courses she teaches and the research she conducts, men report greater sexual satisfaction after finding love.

There’s a  troubling rumour  that ten percent of Americans are gay. “Not exactly,” says Dr Debby. “That number came from old research by the Kinsey Institute; they asked if someone had ever had sex with a same-sex partner. Today, we find around five percent of Americans identify as gay, lesbian or bisexual. Roughly, fifteen percent of Americans have had sex, of some sort, with a same-sex partner, at least once in their life.”

“It’s so long since I had sex,” says comedian Joan Rivers, “I’ve forgotten who ties up whom.” Pop culture, says Dr Debby, “leads to the occasional  bump in promoting healthy sex. After ‘Five Shades of Grey’ published, questions about BDSM increased for a while.”

“Litigation,” said author Gore Vidal, “takes the place of sex at middle-age.” Sexual behaviour, says Dr Debby, “begins to drop off in the late forties among women. For men, it’s in their early fifties.”

Sex health promotion aims at women. Progress, said Karl Marx, follows, exactly, the lead of women. A new HPV vaccine for men begins a new era, says Dr Debby. 

“In America, sex is an obsession; in other parts of the world it's fact,” said actor Marlene Dietrich. “When  coloured , by the Monica Lewinski affair or the television show, ‘Sex in the City, America openly talks about sex,” says Dr Debby. Talking about sex must be on going , not  incited  only by events inflated in the media.

For all her seriousness, Dr Debby also writes books for children. “‘The I Love You More Book’ is for children, of all ages. I wrote it during college. I was too shy to show “Love You More” to anyone. Years later, I dusted it off, typed it, edited it and sent it to a publisher. Today, it’s in bookstores, everywhere.” 

In this exclusive interview, Dr Debby talks about orgasms, gays, lesbians, bisexuals, promoting and studying sex and much more. Click to read the complete interview with Dr Debby Hernbenick.




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